Hyperlink from Hell: A Couch Potatos Guide to the Afterlife

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I'm The Doctor and this is Rose. The most shocking to Dani was that his facial features were nearly identical to her Grandfather's. This estate is Unplottable on any map or muggle traveling device. How did you get passed Fluffy or all the security measures? What an absolutely fascinating turn of events. This is just getting better and better. He's a little banged up because of Krummy trying to take him out at the Quidditch World Cup this afternoon and Mummy is going through that postpartum thing.

The two of them are both really famous and everything. She's not answering us. Hermione raced into the barn to protect her child. When will you learn that anything is possible in time and space? They called you Dani so that makes you Danielle Stephanie Anastasia.

We really mean you no ill will. Harry spied the blue police box behind them and couldn't believe his eyes. It's my twenty-fifth birthday and so far it's been a crummy one. He can't stand the actor with his likeness and now this…" Hermione calmly walked over to them and picked up her daughter. I should have known that if he and Torchwood were real that you would be too. He's a quarter of a century old today, so let the boy be. It forever changed Rose as well much to her complete and total surprise and my puzzled delight she get's to cheat death too.

He's too riled up to deal with any visitors. The Doctor sympathized with the little girl. The other problem is that Dani got a good scare today and isn't ready to admit it yet. She and Daisy tag-teamed and turned it into harmless confetti before it could bounce off the Shield Charm and harm any innocents let alone wake her cousins or baby brothers from their naps. We wrote our own series of books on our seven years at Hogwarts and can easily find you copies to read. You could also always watch the DVD's of the movies.

They used the second manuscript for HBP and Full Circle…well that was a joint venture because Mione and I didn't wish to expose our world. I'll get you settled in a guest suite then you can indulge in a nice long soak in the tub. Danielle Stephanie please take Fluffy into the house he can nap in your room with you. It's bedtime for you. Be nice to them they are friends. Just runs headlong into any situation regardless of the danger…" The Doctor stopped his grumbling and turned to stare off at the lake. No not once, but her, well, she gets it on the first go.

She sacrificed her life to save mine not to mention the time stream…I carried her lifeless body into the TARDIS and suddenly she's glowing like a bloomin sun in my arms! Gods her mother was pissed at me horrified at what I'd done to her precious baby girl. She was at first until we came up with a solution and cloned Rose, providing Jackie with a carbon copy of her beloved baby girl.

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She's no concern of yours? This form cares loads too much for my liking! Rose was upset and I couldn't have that, so I fixed the problem end of discussion! Want me to be president and all that! This mind you after I soothed Jackie by cloning my Rose. That favor that I called in is gonna bite me in the arse I just know it…You see Rose was quite the busybody during the brief time she wielded the time vortex and that's putting things mildly.

Then we happened across the Vamperee, bloodthirsty evil buggers that's until you shoot them with a type of antidote then they can be quite tame. Damon was their leader liked to prey on innocents. Rose got between him and his latest snack. It never dawned on me…I'm not supposed to be able to father children…My interlude with Reinette produced an heir to my legacy. The proof was standing in front of my eyes.

BEYOND DEATH AND BACK

Rose looked like a mirror image of her…By Rassilon this is beyond complicated…" He raked his fingers through his hair in frustration. Considering the circumstances your Rose seems to be handling the change rather well. Yet, I can't get up the courage to show her what she looks like. I mean, she liked her well enough when she met Reinette, but then after that final trip into the fireplace. Finding out that it was too late that she had died…I kind of moped about for a while and she's fussy when it comes to anyone breaking my hearts. Gods you always were easy to rile up some things never change.

Hermione tucked Dani in first before tending to their guest. She led her upstairs and into the Avalon suite. Um…no…I mean I don't wanna be a bother or put you out or anything…" Rose bit down on her lip she was still in a daze. I'm a Healer tending to people is what I love to do. The trick is to embrace it, not fear it, and then only then can you learn how to wield it. She's happy as can be now and all because she has her own happy world the way she likes it and another me that dotes on her every whim.

She looked like Reinette. Madame de Pompadour the woman who ensnared her Doctor's heart in the span of less than a day then on losing her shattered it. Lady Romana had told her that her incarnations were of ancestors down her family tree or past lives like her previous incarnation where she'd been an Ancient warrior queen. She was happy to at least be somewhat back to normal with similar features to her old self. Rose planted her hands on her hips and stomped her feet in frustration. Damn it all in her idea of fun!

I've gotten him exactly where I want him and now that's been blown out of the water! Knowing him and his morals it's back to chaste kisses on the forehead! No wonder he refused to let her see herself in the mirror! So what if she was princess beautiful! Who cared if she may or may not be some of some relation to Madame de Pompadour? He obviously had done more than dancing those hours that he was away, but then again Mickey had been with her so he'd been a free agent. Not that her and Mickey were lovers during that time.

She'd been hopelessly smitten with her Doctor nearly from minute one. I mean who cared that it'd make him what her many- great-grandpapa or something like that. I mean like it really mattered anymore since he wasn't human and neither was she! Meanwhile at the oak tree The Doctor buried his face in his hands and muttered something like.

It's no wonder that you're so drawn to him and him to you. Here in our world it's no big thing. I mean my cousins are living proof that it's not always a mistake to inbreed give or take a bad seed or two. I don't see that happening between the two of you, because the one thing that keeps him going. The one constant in his mind always is his belief in you. He revealed that in the pit when he faced Satan himself, bet he didn't tell you that did he. He's lost without you.

You anchor him to reality. Rose wasted no time striping out of her clothes and nearly diving into the tub.

There has to be a tub in there somewhere, but then I've never really asked about it…hmm…maybe I will. Touch the screen in here, the bedroom, or sitting room. Then select intercom and one of us will be up to check on you. I'll have to give Franc a ring and he'll send some clothes and necessities to the house…your size three or four? I'll have him go by that. James, Lily, with Jamie and Rafe in their arms arrived home an hour or so later to a quiet house.

Harry and Dani must by resting. I'm glad we decided to come home instead of Holiday with the others this weekend. Do they know something that we don't? I see no sign of guests do you? Where are my girls, siblings and my boys? Many-great-Grandma Gwen is on a tear this afternoon not unlike Hermione…I wonder if the ring sets her off too. The girls are with the twins enjoying the beach with the rest of their cousins under the watchful eyes of their grandparents, uncles, and aunts. Is Arthur here as well?

You could say the two of them are visiting an old friend. You could say he's a traveler of sorts. He's got a companion named Rose as well and by the sounds of it the show was way off the mark accuracy wise not unlike Jo's off version of HBP. There's no Martha never was because Rose is a time lord just like he is and on her second regeneration to boot.

The Doctor and Rose are fictional characters. How many fingers do you see? Rose is upstairs in the Avalon suite. Hermione got her settled there…now as for that fictional rubbish, well then so are we or aren't you forgetting that?! In the muggle world I am fiction! Walk out on the terrace and see for yourself! He's sitting under the Great Oak or he was a while ago!

I'm telling you the goddamned truth!! I'm not throwing a tantrum! I'm preventing my parents from having me admitted to St. Mungo's for psychiatric evaluation! Hermione pointed to the fireplace with her finger and it ignited in her signature colored flames. The fire changed showing them who they wanted to see. The Doctor chatting with Arthur and Merlin under the great oak and then it showed Rose crawling into bed for a snooze. I'm gonna do what I wish!

Hyperlink from Hell: A Couch Potato's Guide to the Afterlife

I Am twenty-five and damn well know my own limits!! I defeated Voldemort this is nothing!! Well you could have fooled me!! Get back in that bed or else! Maybe Dani's right you do have postpartum depression!!

Hyperlink from Hell: A Couch Potato's Guide to the Afterlife

Your moods are off the charts lately and weren't nearly this bad the entire time you were carrying the boys! I'm not postpartum…I love my babies! Dani doesn't hate you she loves you and Ally and Mia thought you needed time with Dani. The two of you are so alike that you clash with each other. It's been one thing after another this month…" Hermione sobbed miserably. I'm sorry today went all chaos and I know that you've had a hard time of it this month.

Hermione went to hold her son. Rafe is still snoozing in his crib. Jamie was the only one of the two that got spooked. It's quite common here to have sudden tempests brew up out of nowhere. He's twenty-five and they treat him as if he were one of the wee ones! It's not my fault if he can't deal with that. No harm came of it…he's upset over nothing. I granted his wish when he found his first love in France. My debt to him has been pain in full. The blood relation is distant no harm will come from their pairing. She's of three different bloodlines time-lord, were-wolf, and human.

Could have fooled me! He's daft as a human or as clueless as a moron. Come along you two let us continue this in Avalon. Never touch something that doesn't belong to you.


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Step away from the pretty blue box. Like we needed some sort of intergalactic time mess to solve! What's it doin' here in our barn? K-9 Mark VII is a tad territorial about his home. It was unnerving in itself that the two of them looked so alike they could pass for twin brothers. I mean if anyone can handle a situation like that we can.

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He's been through hell and back many times and has the right to be cautious. Are you in danger? I cannot protect you unless you let me out. No crisis just a well-earned rest and relaxation break. K-9 could now hover and was state of the art, unlike his former version. His head resembled a robotic dog and his body was not nearly as box like as it had been before.

At the cultural and thus ecological watershed, memory constitutes a process of contemporary river reflection, which is distinguished by its sense of provisionality, loss and fragile continuity. University of British Columbia Library. For non-commercial purposes only, such as research, private study and education.

Additional conditions apply, see Terms of Use https: Doctor of Philosophy - PhD. Arts, Faculty of English, Department of. But I'd certainly make the same disclaimer myself.

Lindy Moone was parented by mental health professionals, and her grandfather worked in or lived near a castle-ish Georgian-style manor house on the grounds of an institution like the one in Hyperlink, so there is some real-life inspiration that gives this unbelievable novel a bizarre authenticity. The mental patients in Hyperlink are so vivid and authentic, they can only be inspired by real life people—who are, after all, are stranger than fictional characters.

People often have to explain jokes to me, which makes me shake my fist at God for not giving me a fully operational brain. Then I get to thinking, and I shake my fist of rage at the people who try to convince me there is a God. In other words, this book has me agitated. But the author, in college I stalked Lindy Moone on twitter and Facebook for personal info , was the only female in a house shared with a bunch of guys, who sound like cast members of The Big Bang Theory, so I decided to grow up, set aside my squeamish all right, prudish disdain for male boob obsession, and see what the suddenly naked James and his bimbo lady friend would do next.

James is an idiot, but so are millions of real-life men. Win the lottery, buy yourself a reality TV show, become a celebrity. Oh, and have some weird, Aspie-like gift of remembering every arcane fact and trivia ever known to humankind.

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Again, I am jealous. My memory is wretched. Why do jerks win the gift of good memory AND a winning lottery ticket? The opening chapter of this novel is riveting, eerie, beautifully written and compelling. I sampled Chapter One and bought the book because of it. I like the pun so much, I had to keep reading, in spite of potty humor and tongue-in-cheek references to other novels and TV shows, both things that I find off-putting in fiction and film.

Lindy Moone writes so well, her prose is so polished and error-free, I had no choice but to keep reading like some helpless crack addict. Also, in spite of murder and mayhem, things I tend to avoid in fiction, the tone is light. Something unusual is afoot here. My sister in real life was murdered. Do my personal biases and bitterness make me fail to appreciate novels that hit my triggers? Niels Bohr said some things are so serious you can only laugh at them, and Lindy Moone is the champion for making light of a thing like death without coming across as someone making light of murder and death.

This is no small achievement. This is a clever, original, witty novel. Parallel universe James 1 versus James 2 and all the other cast of in-between characters torture my already feeble synapses and neurons. Fans of movies like Inception are sure to love a novel as challenging as this one. Fans of satires like Spaceballs are also sure to love it. I do love that awful movie Spaceballs. Fans of the twisted and deranged, buy with confidence. This has the potential to be a cult classic like that Venus flytrap movie Little House of Horrors, if my dreadful memory serves me at all.

I saw it in college—not telling how many decades ago. Indie Author John L. Dec 17, Carol rated it it was amazing. Hyperlink from Hell is witty, complex, profane, inane and insane. Its author, Lindy Moone, gives fair warning of this on its title page: In s ane Mystery ahead. If you have any sense, or sensibilities, this senseless novel will surely offend some or all of them.

Just put the book down, and back away. This book is for readers who crave something truly original. It has two narrators. The first is female, the acting director of The Haven, an insane asylum. Alre Hyperlink from Hell is witty, complex, profane, inane and insane. Already you may guess where this is going, though I didn't.